Softscaffold · M2 Drill Card
From mentor AQs (Anup) on your Archana session · Core 3 focus
No default WHY
One question
Then silence
Session rules (this month)
- Why-count ≤ 1 (aim for zero).
- One question per turn — never stack frames.
- After a belief/fear line → silence ≥ 3–5s before any stem.
- Urge to give your example/tool → self-reg, then one stem (don’t mentor).
8 partnering stems (use when…)
1Comfort / “I restrict with new audience”
Client names comfort as the gate to speaking.
How do you define this comfort? / Why do you restrict?
As you reflect, being comfortable seems important so you can share — how important is that comfort for you…?
What changes for you with a different audience — in relation to the point you want to make…?
Partnering inquiry · vertical
2“I need to understand them first”
Client says she must understand the group before presenting ideas.
Is that understanding right? (only check)
What makes having that understanding so important before you present your ideas…?
Partnering inquiry · belief under the rule
3“It becomes difficult”
Vague difficulty / stuck language.
Is that correct? (repeat summary only)
How would you define that difficulty — what makes it feel difficult for you…?
Partnering inquiry
4“Experts are already there — why would they hear me?”
Self-judgment / comparison to experts (high-value moment).
Why do you think they won’t hear you?
How does it change anything for you that experts are already there…?
Who are you when you see them as the experts…?
Partnering inquiry · identity · then silence
5“I stay quiet / I don’t tell them”
She knows she could speak and doesn’t (sensitive).
Why don’t you tell them?
You know you could speak and you don’t — what do you sense might happen if you did…?
What makes it fine for you to speak when no one else is speaking…?
Partnering inquiry · no WHY · soft
6Visibility / local vs partner forums
She treats visibility as important in one place and not another.
Why is visibility not important there? Why…? What is visibility? (stacked)
What is “visibility” for you in this context…?
What are you learning about yourself as you compare these two forums…?
Partnering inquiry · one frame only
7Disclaimer / “I can’t admit I don’t know in the group”
Fear of image, trust, less important work (assumption emerging).
Why can’t you make a disclaimer? Why do you say they’ll doubt you?
What might happen if you set context in a group where rapport is still thin…?
If you imagine they might judge — what matters more to you right now: their judgment, or a move that helps the work…?
Is the issue that you truly don’t know — or an assumption that you don’t know? What’s your insight…?
Partnering inquiry · assumption edge
8She “knows it all” but still doesn’t shift
High awareness, low behavior change (don’t rush action).
What should change? How will you use these two tools? (too early / multi)
You can see both the cost and the risk of speaking — which feels like the larger concern for you in this moment…?
What would need to shift in how you see yourself for the gap between knowing and acting to narrow…?
Partnering inquiry · before growth/action
After the stem
- Silence (Reflective Silence muscle).
- If you feel a teaching example rising → self-reg: “Rescue is here” → breath → stay with her words.
- Only after insight: one simple commitment question (Facilitates Growth).
Self-reg red flag (from your M2)
Long “from my experience, I would phrase it like this…” = mentoring creeping in.
Replace with: What would setting context sound like in your words…?